Divorce is a tragic earth-shattering end to a family. If there are children involved, the tragedy becomes significantly worse.

The children’s thoughts may become very self-destructive. The children might constantly ask themselves the following:

• Did I do something wrong?
• What can I do to fix this problem?
• Do I have to side with one of my parents?
• If one of my parents leave, do I still have a mother and a father?

Their attitudes and demeanor are significantly altered practically over night. Some signs are as follows:

• Acting upset and loosing interest in activities.
• Decreased verbal communication.
• Acting out in school. They may be physically abusive to other students, or be less focused in their studies.
• General overall disassociation.

Some parents choose to use their children against the other parent. By putting the child in this situation, the already stressful situation becomes impossible for the child to cope. This child abuse may be due to a parent’s inferiority complex.

Unfortunately, the person who is hurt the most is the child. Parental personal feelings for each other must be placed aside. If there is an issue with custody, a decision must be made in the best decision for the child. As in all families, each parent has his or her strengths and weaknesses. For example, one may be good at discipline, where the other may have a knack for comforting the child. Parents must work together and communicate with each other in order to fully understood and react to the big picture. If the child has divided time between the parents, this communication between parents as stated, will allow each parent to understand the whole situation and not just a portion of the situation. It is still very possible to achieve a happy family atmosphere for the child while divorced.

The courts already have control of numerous aspects of our lives as it is. It is suggested that the parents arrange custody on your own. That said, if one of the parents is overly possessive or abusive, then something should be done.

Holidays, birthdays, and other special occasions should be divided equally in order to benefit all parties involved.

The two of you once shared the most important personal aspects of your lives with each other. You have created a child. The most spectacular process of the universe is creation. Come together to nurture your children.

William Bailey, Author
William’s love for writing is second only to his love for his son. William has published essays, fiction, non-fiction, short storys, and more…

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